...and POP!!!

I can barely contain it all...I'm ready to explode! I'm so full with what God is pouring into me and it's about to come pouring out. This has been a great week and God has given me some great revelation and great direction and focus. Things are coming into view and that feels so refreshing. When you are running a race and you have been pushing past the feeling of your body about to give out...I actually don't personally know this because I don't run (literally, that is)...but you are running and running hoping that it will all end soon before your legs give out from under you. Then you see it, you see in distance a view of the finish line...it sparks something inside you that gives you a boost of "something"...adrenaline, umph, I don't know, but you are then able to keep pushing because you can actually SEE the end is near. You can SEE that you are almost there. All that hard work is about to pay off if you can just reach it! Well I kind of feel like that....I have been nearing the end of a few different things and I can finally see the finish line. I had some moments of panic on the inside as I thought surely my body is gonna give out from under me...but I kept pushing and now I am so close. I am 2 classes away from graduating from the Armour Bearers Discipleship Program and only a few classes shy of my Bachelor's in Theology. I am working on my Business Plan for a new ministry, my ministry, which is part of the completion of my Armour Bearers class. I actually present it next week...a little scary but feeling more and more confident as God pours more revelation into me and helps me walk past the next phase of getting rid of Fear and Insecurity. I have been propelled forward in New and Exciting ways in my worship as a Worship Leader and Prophetic Worshiper. I am coming into ME, finding ME, seeing the ME God created ME to be! It's so amazing to watch myself grow. It's a bit surreal to see yourself somewhere you only partially imagined and not knowing what it would look like. I am going to be 28 this November. I really can't believe how I got here. I mean I was 16 and preggo and now I am 28, so happily married for almost 11 years, have 3 beautiful amazing children who will all be in school in the fall, I am a Youth Pastor, with a God mandated Vision to "Awaken a Generation that will Impact this Nation!", I am learning to be the Prophetic Worship Leader God has called me to be, I am writing and writing which will lead to the Books I will write one day (also God spoken), I am in a place in my life that I can sit back and say WOAH! every day and I love it! I say Woah and Wow and Aaaaahhhh because of God! Nothing I am would be without Him in my life...there is so much more to come...as Joseph was shown big visions and big dreams, God has shown me things and I know it's only in part. I have big vision and big dreams and I know now that I was created with a Purpose and I live my life walking in fulfillment of that...I want nothing else but to be and go and move and walk and live how God intended for me.

I am so full...my body, my flesh, can barely contain it without experiencing extreme butterflies in my tummy, and anxiety in my heart, and an intensity in the pit of me that is stirring and stirring....this must remain my focus, not life and all the crazy things it is CONSTANTLY throwing my way...NO not that! I must push those clouds out of my way with the authority and strength God has freely given His people...I'm His people!!! I have been called by His name and I humbly come before Him and pray and seek His face, turning from all my own ways as I give my self and my ways to Him, so that He will come in and restore me to the original creation and plan He predestined me for, so that He will use me to glorify His Kingdom and reach His people, and awaken them so they won't miss His call!!! I have this revelation of the "point" to all of this....why we are here, why God would even create us if He knows all things and knows our sinful nature...the earth is but a womb to eternity...this, all this is only preparation for what lies ahead, eternity with God. We don't, can't know what that will look like or what it is because it is beyond the capacity of our earthly minds but I know inside that there is more and that is the more with Him, with God....the Holy Spirit drives me and stirs in me and connects me with Jesus who connects me with My Father...you must believe in the Trinity! God IS the Father, the Son Jesus, and the Holy Spirit! They are 3 but ONE. You must believe that and know that! You must open and receive that revelation. Nothing else works without that foundational revelation knowledge. None of this would be without that! In a 2-dimensional world, on paper you see 3 dots. The people that live on that paper can only see within the boundaries of their 2 dimensional world and thus see only 3 dots...they have to believe by faith and revelation knowledge and personal relationship with God to believe He is a part of those 3 dots. Then you have us in our 3/4th dimensional world (4th being time) and we see three dots connected to three fingers...but the point is those 3 fingers connect to ONE hand thus helping to understand the trinity of 3 but 1. We cannot limit ourselves to the capacity of what our minds can understand but be open to what God can show us. We must ask for enlarging and increasing! We must want it, desire it, seek it, work for it to contain it all! Oh God I pray that you would help us not be limited by our own minds and our own understanding, but be open to Your mind, Your ways, Your understanding, Your heart God! Open me up to You, open us all up to more of You! More of Your power and word and knowledge and understanding...it's not easy to will our flesh into submission to Your Spirit, but God I know that all things can happen through You if they are aligned with Your will! Help us to see and know that YOU AND YOU ALONE ARE GOD!!!! Remove the blinders and deceptions. Make the Truth known and shine Your Light on all the dark places. If we are walking blind in any area God please Help Us to see the truth! Chains be broken God! Chains be broken!!! In Jesus Name...Amen!! :)

More is coming....

Christina